I'm new to this whole natural mommy thing, and to be quite honest, I'm not all that good at it. Yes, I'm cloth diapering Blake & Madison, but my main motivation has nothing to do with being a tree hugger or "granola." My top reason is that is will save us money and cut down on the amount of waste we consume. So far so good. Except for the extra laundry it creates, cloth diapering hasn't been all that bad. Slowly I'm learning the terminology and finding out what I like. It wasn't long ago though when I felt lost, drowning in a sea of acronyms that meant nothing to me. Now I know the difference between a pocket and a fitted, an AIO and a prefold.
We all know how opinionated I can be. I speak my mind, though it can get me in to trouble and quite often does. I do tend to see things in black and white, and though I'm flexible, I'm not great with change. Go figure! I rarely think before I speak or act, for that matter. Basically my greatest strengths are also my strongest weaknesses. My point is that I tend to bow up when I feel like someone or something is trying to change me. In my search for the perfect cloth diaper I found that, for most of these "natural" moms, it's all or nothing. You're in or you're out. I think this is why more moms don't cloth diaper. You almost feel judged b/c the rest of your life doesn't follow the same pattern. I read blogs from WAHM (work at home moms) online stores, mostly looking for coupon codes for diaper sites, and find an us versus them (those that use disposables and those that use cloth) mentality. Disclaimer: I do not feel this way about people in my "world" who are cloth diapering. So what do I mean by this all or nothing clique? I don't know, it just seems like those that cloth diaper are also fanatical about organic stuff, whether food or clothing. They firmly believe in attachment parenting, which just isn't for me. They wear shirts that say "Jesus was breastfed," and have bumper stickers that read "spanking is of the devil." Actually I'm not really sure if anyone uses these items, but I see them in the online stores. They don't immunize their children and can't have babies in a hospital (and frown on those who do). They don't let their babies cry, and so on and so forth. Please believe me when I say that I'm not trying to criticize them. I think it's great that people hold firmly to their beliefs. I just don't like it when I get the stink eye for choosing a different way of doing things.
I have two close friends in Maryland, one whom I differ politically and one whom I differ parentally (if that's a word). Each of them adds value to my life and I am quite certain that God placed them in my life to be sand paper, to smooth out my rough edges. Man, do they have a rough road ahead. "As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another." The more I get to know them the more I find that we differ in these areas, but it's no coincidence. God knew what he was doing when he put them in my life, and I'm extremely thankful for them. Katy is my "natural" mommy friend. Now, she has never judged me (that I know of at least) for being different, or for not fitting into her mold, so please know this blog is not about her. It's just my observations about the "culture" in general. But I do use Katy as a filter sometimes. I can ask her about things I read on the Internet, and bounce my ideas off her. I hear her side and then draw my own conclusions about what's best for me.
Sometimes I feel like I'm in high school again trying to fit into a clique that I'm just not right for. The thing is that I don't have to fit in. I just need to do what's best for us and not worry about what other people think. I have great friends who love me no matter how different I am from them. And I'm blessed with great cloth diapering role models, my favorite being my BFF Jo. She has successfully put two precious girls through them and managed to stay sane in the process. She's not entirely "granola" either so I know it can be done.
Really this blog isn't about cloth diapers, which I've pretty much decided to do the Bum Genius, It's about being myself and being grateful for the relationships I have in my life. Despite the substantial differences in certain areas, we still love each other and accept one another for who we are in Christ. At least I hope they all know that. If not, maybe they do now.
Dude (wow, it's been a long time since I've used that word), I'm so falling asleep as I type this. If this makes no sense in the morning, I blame it on the fact that I'll be a single mommy for the weekend and I'm scared to death. Really one has nothing to do with the other, but I am scared. Pray if you get a chance.
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